Imeeji IC Inbox

[weenwoon]

[You are greeted with the sound of randomly disrupted static, at the end of which three melodic beeping signals are heard. Yep, that's your cue to leave a message!]

Comments

Re: more sexual assault trauma plus suicidal tendencies

[maidenheaven]

. . . They are hurt, because of how deeply you were hurt—is that not so?

[ . . . ]

Though it might be too difficult now, they can only move on when you move on. ... And—it is difficult, to get better, but it is certainly possible. So long as you do not force yourself to do more than you can do at the time, and so long as you have the space to do so.

Until then, it is in their love for you that their hearts ache; there is naught else to be done for them but to let yourself heal.

[weenwoon]

...I simply wish it had never happened in the first place. And... for them to know, truly know that it was not their fault.

[He sighs, feeling completely drained.]

...Jason suggested I turn to BAD END for help with... changing the memory. I was against it at first, but--it may be for the best now.

[maidenheaven]

. . . You don't wish to remove the memory entirely?

[weenwoon]

[...he looks up (well, down I guess) at Lucifel.]

What good would that be?

[maidenheaven]

What good will it be, to change the memory so that the pain remains, but you don't know who to be wary of?

[weenwoon]

[He frowns.]

But it is the pain I wish to be rid of, not the who. It is why I do not wish to remove it altogether--I do not wish to trust him so blindly again, not when I know now what he can do to others.

[maidenheaven]

. . . I do not know if that ability can be used to remove the pain. If that were the case . . .

[ pauses, frowns ]

. . . Well, though, Jason-san would surely know more than I.

[weenwoon]

[He nods, slowly.]

I shall ask. I am acquainted with several people on that unit, too... He said that someone had turned to them before with a very similar request, for very similar reasons. So... I have hope.

[maidenheaven]

[ his gaze flickers down for a moment—


then, he looks up to him ]

In the meantime—if it's the pain that you want alleviated, might I suggest contacting a member of pep!pep! . . . ?

Their ability, Cloud Nine, may be what you seek for the pain, at least in the present.

[weenwoon]

[ :) have fun luci!]

I... don't know. I opposed that at first, too--it was...

[He breathes out quietly.]

He... manipulated my perception, too. Made it feel pleasant, at first--until it was no longer fun, of course.

[Gods, he feels like he's going to throw up just thinking about it.]

[maidenheaven]

The ability does not introduce pleasant feelings—it simply strips away the negative.

. . . For myself, I could recognize, still, intellectually, that something was "unpleasant"—but it did not reach me. I could feel that my heart was not swayed, and so I felt I could move forward without being overwhelmed by those emotions.

[ then, ]

I understand, if you don't wish to allow yourself to be affected by others in such a way. I can only give you my word that it will not be like that time—that it will be safe, and that any member of pep!pep! that administers the ability—[ like it's a medicine ]—will remove it immediately if you do not feel comfortable with it, or otherwise will not administer it again.

[weenwoon]

[He looks at the floor for a time, thinking about it. It... it does sound like what he needs. To be able to distance himself from this, to finally be able to sleep again, maybe even kiss Lily again.

He misses her so much.]

You've... used it before, too?

[maidenheaven]

A number of times.

. . . It's saved me from great pain, when I needed something like that the most. I'm grateful to the members of pep!pep! who took care of me then.

[weenwoon]

If it's helped you... I shall consider it. I've... simply been afraid...

[He runs his hands down his face tiredly.]

I believe I know barely anyone on the unit, but...

I... do trust Sky. If they have that ability, I shall turn to them.

[maidenheaven]

I understand the fear. ... But, I find. . . . those fears of mine were hardly ever rewarded. None have turned me away in my time of need, and I received no judgment—only sympathy. My humanity was respected.

If you would like me to contact someone, I can. But I'm sure Sky-san can do it for you, if that person has the ability or funds to purchase the ability.

[ pausing—in a lighter tone, ]

Would you like to try a brownie? I've read that chocolate does wonders for one's mood.

[weenwoon]

[He smiles at the transition. Lucifel is sweet... er, edit that thought. Lucifel is kind. There we go.]

Indeed. Vergil brought me some hot chocolate, on the night after we all woke up... It was wonderful.

[Taking! A brownie!]

Thank you for coming to talk to me, Lucifel. I... do feel a little calmer. And, though it is selfish of me to say, and I wish with all my heart that we didn't both experience such things... it is good to know that someone understands.

[maidenheaven]

It isn't selfish—if I could bring even a little comfort to you with my presence, then I'm satisfied with that much.

[ with a soft smile, ]

And, I'm glad to finally meet you, though the circumstances are poor.

[weenwoon]

[u got that right, luci]

Likewise. But I am certain we can put the circumstances of our meeting behind us--not to mention that we technically first met in the game. A much more pleasant first encounter. I really am quite impressed by how level-headed and logical you are, not to mention pleasant company overall.

[maidenheaven]

Your words are too kind, Levity-san—but I'm glad you find my company pleasant, despite my forwardness. You are quite kind, to indulge me so.

. . . And, I would ask you to continue that—though we've only met infrequently thus far, if I can be a source of comfort to your worries, I'd like to be that. Ah—and if you have need of healing, of course, you can always contact me.

[weenwoon]

[He tilts his head curiously.]

Do you think yourself forward? The word seems to usually imply a degree of negativity. I would call you open and honest, instead--admirable qualities, to my eye.

And... thank you. I would certainly love to spend more time with you. As for healing--I do hope I will not need it often, but... I am grateful for the offer. On my end, if there is anything you need repaired or built, I am at your service.

[He touches his chest thoughtfully.]

...Remind me - can sensitIV remove scars?

1/2

[maidenheaven]

[ just kind of laughs a little sheepishly at the compliments ]

[maidenheaven]

—Ah . . .

We can, yes. Though, if the area is healed when there is no injury, the scar will re-appear.

Still, it's not 500 points for us to remove the scar.

[ in a lighter tone at the end, a little jokey ]

[weenwoon]

[Oh. :( Oh well ]

I see... Then I suppose I've not much choice but to leave it be for now.

[He sighs.]

I know not why only this particular scar remained, but I am glad it was not one of the worse injuries I endured that were left.

[maidenheaven]

Could it be from that room as well—in the meadow . . . ?

[weenwoon]

Ah--you've gone through there, too? I was lucky enough that I had D.Va with me... I cannot fight, least of all kill someone, but she is much stronger than me, and she was furious to find out that I died by S-- by his hand.

[He looks aside, conflicted. Absinthe was pretty displeased, too, and remembering that... only makes everything more painful. The fact that part of him cared enough to be concerned for Levity, open up to him, try to warn him.

Maybe it--maybe it really was his own fault, in the end, for being so damn short-sighted and naive. He's the reason why he's been hurt, why the people he loves are suffering.

Levity's hand on his chest curls into a fist, digging into his clothes.]