[You are greeted with the sound of randomly disrupted static, at the end of which three melodic beeping signals are heard. Yep, that's your cue to leave a message!]
[Hythlodaeus is tense, at first - uncertain what will be said, wary of trusting anyone and anything. But it... helps. His mind has been running in circles, guilt and self-hatred and desperate need for an answer as to why all weighing brutally on him. And it's hard to remember that he's a person, not a thing, that caring for him is not a burden on others.
He closes his eyes halfways through Hades's words, tears welling up. Though it's been such a short time, he's already so starved for comfort.]
...Of course I don't want them to hide anything from me... I think--I think Lily tries, and I cannot bear it... I want--I want them to be happy, genuinely, I want them to be safe, I want... I want this to never have happened...
[He digs his fingers into the plush of the carpet, crying more openly now.]
I know you do. You want them to be happy, safe, content, because you love them. And it is something you should strive for. But perhaps not like this.
[He would normally hold his hand but he doesn't not want to scare him. He gives him a fond smile instead.]
Weak and foolish? You are neither. I have the privilege of being spoiled at what your true nature holds as you begin your journey regaining your memories and making new ones. You will change and grow, yes, but there are parts of you that will always be you, Hythlodaeus.
Kind. Compassionate. Inquisitive. Able to corral this grumpy man when he's being particularly stubborn.
And it never hurts to try to love, my friend. To look for connection. To open your heart. That I learned from you. Yes, sometimes it will hurt, strike at your very core, but in the end you'll find those that make it all worth it.
[It is quite painful to watch him and not be able to physically comfort him.]
My heart does yearn what is best for you, my friend. And no matter what happens, I will always care for you. This pain you feel will dull over time, replaced with better memories. At least that I can try to promise you.
[He simply... lets himself cry for a time. He wants to believe what Hades is saying, he really does, but... It's hard, right now, when his nearly every moment is haunted by memories.]
[WEENWOON NOISES!!!! Hythlodaeus gasps quietly at the sound of it. Lahabrea spoke to him in the language, too, before--before he started remembering. Right now, he's too shaken to think about it in more detail, but... there's comfort in it.]
P-Please... I asked Five, yesterday, I could--I could finally rest, but then when I'm awake, I remember...
[It is obvious by how he starts to move and then stops himself he would like to give him more physical comforts of embraces, but that would be a bad idea to say the least.]
I promise you, Hythlodaeus. Somewhere calm and quiet. I can also give you shared control of the dream, but I will reign it in would you fears begin to manifest in terrible ways.
Just take a deep breathe. You are in the company of someone who loves you very much. I will care for you as much as I am able. You never need be alone.
[That seems to be a revelation to him, and one that's... incredibly soothing, actually. What he needs is to have more control again, over himself, over his space, over his life--]
...could I... or could you--use it to make my body feel mine again?..
[The question is a whisper and even as he says it Hythlodaeus knows that the answer is no, that letting himself get lost in dreams is no real way out. But it is painful indeed to contemplate returning to reality if he is given a taste of peace, of comfort again.]
[He'll pull himself up to at least get him a proper glass.]
Then wait here a moment.
[Surely it doesn't take long for him to exit the room and find something appropriate in FiN. When he does he returns and places it on the ground next to him before lounging further than arm's distance away.]
I can not time it perfectly, but I will arrive as soon as I am able.
[Hythlodaeus nods before taking the potion carefully. There's a slight trembling to his hands, but that's probably only to be expected, given his fear of dreaming lately.]
...Alright. I'll wait for you, then.
[He's just going to make himself comfortable in one of the sleep pods... and drift off to sleep.
Surprisingly, when Hades arrives the nightmare isn't, in fact, connected to what happened in Absinthe's heart... but in another.
It's a dark, unfamiliar room. There's the stench of fresh blood - and maybe not just blood. There's the corpse of a man on the floor - no one Hades knows, and it's very obviously a corpse. Few people can stay alive after having their head smashed in - repeatedly, apparently, to the point that the skull is broken through and there's not just blood but other matter seeping out of it, too.
Levity is crouched in a far corner, face buried in his hands; a wooden bat lies at his feet. One of his arms and a leg are clearly broken, his clothes splashed with blood. It's not hard to guess who killed whom here.]
[He takes a glimpse but no more than that as the dream fades in wisps of purple and black smoke leaving the area almost in complete darkness before he's greeted with a field of flowers. It just about sunrise with the sun peaking over the horizon as the stars fade away to the purples, oranges, and blues of a new day.
It's warm, the smell of the outdoors is thick, and his clothes are mended, the blood removed as well as any other injuries he might have sustained. Hades takes a few steps past him, his back to him, as he watches the sun rise.]
[The transition is almost sudden, but by the same token it helps startle Hythlodaeus out of the nightmare... and he's quickly captivated by the new dream. It feels... right, maybe. Safe. Serene.
It feels like it has been centuries since he last felt like that.
Rather than moving to follow Hades, he sits down in the field, eyes locked to the skies. The edge between night and day... there is something incredibly soothing about it.]
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He closes his eyes halfways through Hades's words, tears welling up. Though it's been such a short time, he's already so starved for comfort.]
...Of course I don't want them to hide anything from me... I think--I think Lily tries, and I cannot bear it... I want--I want them to be happy, genuinely, I want them to be safe, I want... I want this to never have happened...
[He digs his fingers into the plush of the carpet, crying more openly now.]
Why am I so weak, Hades?.. Why am I such a fool?
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[He would normally hold his hand but he doesn't not want to scare him. He gives him a fond smile instead.]
Weak and foolish? You are neither. I have the privilege of being spoiled at what your true nature holds as you begin your journey regaining your memories and making new ones. You will change and grow, yes, but there are parts of you that will always be you, Hythlodaeus.
Kind. Compassionate. Inquisitive. Able to corral this grumpy man when he's being particularly stubborn.
And it never hurts to try to love, my friend. To look for connection. To open your heart. That I learned from you. Yes, sometimes it will hurt, strike at your very core, but in the end you'll find those that make it all worth it.
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Vergil--told me I can teach people t-to be kinder-- but I keep thinking that maybe... maybe I should learn how not to care, instead...
[He curls up more, hiding his face in his arms.]
And I-- I try, but I hate it too, and I don't know what to do...
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My heart does yearn what is best for you, my friend. And no matter what happens, I will always care for you. This pain you feel will dull over time, replaced with better memories. At least that I can try to promise you.
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I want to die, Hades...
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[And he sure is speaking in that warbly language of the ancients.]
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P-Please... I asked Five, yesterday, I could--I could finally rest, but then when I'm awake, I remember...
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He did tell me, and that was kind of him. And when sleep takes you, I will steer your dreams into something more pleasant.
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...Promise? Hades, I'm--I'm scared to let... to let anyone into my mind...
[He takes a shaky breath, helpless tears welling up in his eyes.]
I don't want to be scared, I hate it, but, but it's there, it's not leaving, I don't feel safe anywhere--
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I promise you, Hythlodaeus. Somewhere calm and quiet. I can also give you shared control of the dream, but I will reign it in would you fears begin to manifest in terrible ways.
Just take a deep breathe. You are in the company of someone who loves you very much. I will care for you as much as I am able. You never need be alone.
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[That seems to be a revelation to him, and one that's... incredibly soothing, actually. What he needs is to have more control again, over himself, over his space, over his life--]
...could I... or could you--use it to make my body feel mine again?..
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[He puts his chin in his hand.]
I could try. Or at the very least I could attempt to soothe your soul. But it would be a temporary measure.
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...One day at a time. One moment at a time. Temporary is better than nothing, Hades...
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I would suspect you have trouble falling asleep on your own.
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[The question is a whisper and even as he says it Hythlodaeus knows that the answer is no, that letting himself get lost in dreams is no real way out. But it is painful indeed to contemplate returning to reality if he is given a taste of peace, of comfort again.]
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Shall we then?
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Alright. Can you put me to sleep yourself? Cosmo gave me a potion last time.
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It's... fine as long as it doesn't taste like much.
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Then wait here a moment.
[Surely it doesn't take long for him to exit the room and find something appropriate in FiN. When he does he returns and places it on the ground next to him before lounging further than arm's distance away.]
I can not time it perfectly, but I will arrive as soon as I am able.
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...Alright. I'll wait for you, then.
[He's just going to make himself comfortable in one of the sleep pods... and drift off to sleep.
Surprisingly, when Hades arrives the nightmare isn't, in fact, connected to what happened in Absinthe's heart... but in another.
It's a dark, unfamiliar room. There's the stench of fresh blood - and maybe not just blood. There's the corpse of a man on the floor - no one Hades knows, and it's very obviously a corpse. Few people can stay alive after having their head smashed in - repeatedly, apparently, to the point that the skull is broken through and there's not just blood but other matter seeping out of it, too.
Levity is crouched in a far corner, face buried in his hands; a wooden bat lies at his feet. One of his arms and a leg are clearly broken, his clothes splashed with blood. It's not hard to guess who killed whom here.]
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It's warm, the smell of the outdoors is thick, and his clothes are mended, the blood removed as well as any other injuries he might have sustained. Hades takes a few steps past him, his back to him, as he watches the sun rise.]
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It feels like it has been centuries since he last felt like that.
Rather than moving to follow Hades, he sits down in the field, eyes locked to the skies. The edge between night and day... there is something incredibly soothing about it.]
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The dawn of another beautiful day. They still come, one by one, even if we can't always appreciate it.
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