homicidalrage: (pic#14697451)
5 | Valour ([personal profile] homicidalrage) wrote in [personal profile] weenwoon 2021-04-24 11:47 pm (UTC)

Day 355

Valour 5: I'm sorry
Valour 5: For yelling at you and for placing unreasonable expectations on you
Valour 5: You can't understand me if I don't explain myself clearly and that's not your fault, it's mine
Valour 5: I'm not ready to talk to you again in person but I don't want Luther or Hades to feel as though one day they'll have to choose between one of us. So we have to resolve this one way another.
Valour 5: And it isn't as if I hate you anyway, I just need time for myself
Valour 5: Regardless of my worries in regards to Alexander, I know you weren't telling me I'm a bad brother
Valour 5: But the fact of the matter is that I am
Valour 5: All I know of my siblings come from what little I remember of the 13 years we spent together and what's written in Vanya's book. They've had a lifetime without me and I'm barely able to hold a normal conversation with them now that we don't have to stop the world from ending.
Valour 5: I'm trying to figure out what to do with our relationship
Valour 5: If I'm telling you to leave something alone, that's me telling you I can't handle it
Valour 5: If you push forward despite me saying that, that just ends up hurting me
Valour 5: The more you fo that the more I feel trapped and the harder I push back
Valour 5: Which is how we got into this situation to begin with
Valour 5: I know you're a good person, and that you care not just about Luther and Hades, but about myself as well
Valour 5: But I need space
Valour 5: You said you wanted to understand me so that's why I'm writing this. I have nothing else to say.

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